How often do you talk to your parents and siblings?
"Be sure to ask the girl how close she is to her family," admonishes Pittsburgh lawyer Carla Schiff Donnelly. - Often divorces happen because one spouse is too close to her family and puts her interests above those of her spouse. And after you get married, you have to make sure that your young family's relationship is a priority. Conversely, a girl's poor relationship with her significant other may indicate an unstable psyche and an inability to maintain a close relationship for long."
Do you believe in the adage, "And they lived happily ever after?"
Attorney Eisold Miller of New Rochelle warns, "In any relationship, you have to make an effort and compromise. If a girl thinks a 'happily ever after' ending just happens, she's not likely to make an adequate partner."
Are you married?
The question seems an odd one for a romantic date, yet Atlanta lawyer Randall Kessler highly recommends asking it. Answering "Living apart" or "About to split up" is far from the same as "Divorced." If you have far-reaching plans, make sure the girl is officially divorced."
Do you love your job?
"Find out how the girl feels about her job. Loyal or frivolous? Better to know right away that she's married to her job and she'll never have time to lay in bed with you on a Sunday morning, go on vacation, or even just go to the movies," cautions attorney Lisa Helfend Meyer of Los Angeles.
Where did you last vacation?
Lawyer Carolyn C. Van Tyne of Boston suggests you ask that question so you don't have to ask another, far more uncomfortable one. "What you really want to know is how the girl paid for her vacation. The fact is that one of the main causes of divorce is the partners' different attitudes toward finances. The vacation question will help you learn about the attitude toward money of the one you ended up with on your first date. For example, if the vacation was expensive, you might exclaim, "Wow, that must be a lot of money!" If the girl responds, "Big deal, I had a fifth credit card lying around with nothing to do, and my grandmother lent me some money," you might want to pay off the bill and run.How did your last relationship end?
"Pay attention to how the girl explains the reason for her last breakup," advises Carla Schiff Donnelly. - If she blames everything on her ex, that's a very bad sign. But if the girl admits that she's also to blame for the breakup, it shows good character traits like humanity, honesty and the ability to develop personally."
If you could go back in time, what would you change about your life?
Lisa Helfend Meyer assures that this question can show you a person's true motives and character more than any other. "It's bad enough if a girl answers, 'I would move to live away from my mother.' It's very bad if she answers, 'I'd get my first boyfriend, who I'm still in love with.' But if she says, 'I would have achieved my dream and become an actress or a doctor,' that's okay," the lawyer diagnoses.