Make a list of goals.
Do not be afraid to set big goals, because someone has already achieved them once, so there is a chance and you. To achieve the big goals between them you need to prescribe the intermediate.
Next, break down the goals into potentially possible, potentially desirable, and actually necessary.
Then number them in order of importance.
For example, you struggle with pride and temper tantrums. This is actually an important goal.
The deadline for when you want to see results is September 1.
Your intermediate goals would be to praise someone once a day, then praise someone for a week, etc.
Make a plan of action.
Write a timeline for when you need to achieve the goal.
For example, save up for a trip by the summer. Learn to type blindly by the end of the year. It all depends on your abilities and opportunities. That is why it is better to write realistic deadlines.
Write possible difficulties and ways to overcome them.
For example, to save up enough money for a trip can prevent a cold, which is very likely. if your immune system is not so strong. So it is not worth it to save up a little bit. And a little more, then you will have a small reserve for unforeseen expenses.
If you find it hard to save money and not waste it, then give it to a trusted member of your family for safekeeping.
While you are saving, give up credit. If you take out a loan, you definitely won't reach your goal. If the loan is not justified, that is, not vital, then it will just be an unnecessary expense for you.
Let's say you set a goal - to develop some good quality that is lacking in you. Your life experience, baggage, habits will not contribute to it. So firstly, tune in, to fight with yourself and secondly, clearly adhere to your rules on the correction of character.
For example, you are struggling with irascibility and want to be more calm and balanced. A more specific goal is restraint in your words. Your small goals, and if you achieve them-victories, might be to
saying "Good morning!" to someone in the morning and wishing them a good day,
aim for a day without swearing, sarcasm, or yelling,
to say a compliment, to praise someone,
compliment and praise yourself,
If there is an argument in the line at the store, leave for another store. If there is no opportunity to leave, then with all your might to remain silent and just make the purchase you really came for,
faced with injustice to someone or even to yourself, then do not clarify the relationship by arguing, but stop, breathe deeply, think whether it is worth it to solve the case now on the nerves and if you have calmed down, then in the form of a dialogue to discuss the problem. Exactly in the form of a dialogue, not in the form of your angry monologue, with your voice breaking off and accompanied by a further rise in blood pressure and a completely ruined day.
You need to clearly follow your goals for the day, otherwise your body and psyche will become slothful and will not try to change. However, if you snapped, you didn't hold back, you also shouldn't beat yourself up for too long. You may have lost the battle, but not the war! So analyze what provoked you so strongly and why you allowed yourself to give in to the provocation, try next time in a similar situation to restrain as best you can.
Imagine what I really am.
Try to mentally imagine your psychological portrait. It's a tremendous work of the mind and psyche! How do you do it?
Think of pleasant and unpleasant situations and look at yourself in them from the outside. Then analyze how you would like to look in such situations, if they recur. This will help solidify the positive side of your personality and begin to replace the negative.
For example, you yelled, you argued with someone, and you got swearing off your tongue. This is really psychologically overwhelming situation that you do not want to repeat in the future, because you really are not!
So imagine yourself restrained and sensible. You hear some untactfulness on the part of the other. But do not give in to provocation, and turned everything into a joke, and at home affected you nerves calmed spouse. Or you tactfully responded to rudeness and let the person know that you need to respect.
You need to imagine "what I really am" in a very realistic way, so that you can show it in the right moment. If you imagine an emotional scene with tears, complicated confessions of guilt and declarations of love, it is unlikely to be played out and show such a good quality as sincerity and self-control. Such scenes that are too emotional or on the contrary too restrained are good for a movie, because it is a game. In real life, you have to present yourself very realistically, your tone of voice, and to say the words in a manner that is familiar to you, in an environment that is familiar to you. You can also imagine the person you are most likely to have this conversation with. Of course, he may not react in the way you have planned, but herein lies your willpower - not to give in to the planned behavior plan and come out a winner in a good sense.
That what you present yourself as well in a sense, that will show what you really are. If you present yourself as assertive and not yielding, hard and tough, then deep down you want to be exactly so. If you present yourself as soft, kind and peaceful, then this is your ideal and the meaning of your transformations.
So, we've discussed the 3 steps to finding out "what I really am." If you think seriously, you will learn something new about yourself and understand where to move forward. And we sincerely wish you to develop as a person and achieve success!!!
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