WIFE:To be an irresistible husband, you must learn to meet the needs of your wife. If you take time to study your wife and make her happy, you will end up becoming her dream husband while she will in turn become the wife you prayed for. As I show
you the general needs of women it is now left for you to pinpoint what your wife wants, and then use them to win her and build a better family life.
1. Unconditional Love. “Every wife’s story is different, but every wife shares the same need for unconditional love and acceptance”- Barbara Roseberg. Every woman wants to be loved unconditionally. She doesn’t want to be loved because of what she can do in the kitchen or in the bedroom. She wants to be accepted and celebrated. It is wrong to condemn, criticize or give her conditions she must live up to if she must enjoy your patronage.
2. Every woman wants you to show her your love and affection. It is not just about saying it. she desires that you express your love daily. Physical closeness, friendship, gift, care and tenderness are things every woman wants.
3. You can’t say you love her without giving her your attention. You must learn to put her into your “To do” list every day. Take time off your “busyness” to be with her and make her happy. Sneak out of your schedule to give her a treat.
4. You must learn to appreciate her for her good deeds, good cooking, taking care of the house, support to you, motherhood etc.
5. “Healthy affirmation is a key ingredient in unconditional love. It is like a magnet; it
draws us in, it attracts us”- Gary Roseberg.
Learn to express love to your wife. Affirm
her, tell her “I love you, baby”, “You are
wonderful, honey”, “I am proud of you”, “You are one of God’s richest blessings to me”, “I feel safe and secured with you”.
6. Be totally faithful to her. Be faithful financially and sexually. Never go to another woman for sex; get it at home from your wife.
7. Accommodate her in your thinking, plan, goal and budget. Make her the love of your life, the number two in your life after God.
8. Financial Provision. There is no way you can be her HONEY if you don’t give her MONEY. Make her happy by providing for her. You can’t say you are the head of the family if she pays all the bills.
9. Family Commitment. Be totally committed and yoked to your family. Think of them, make money for them; make your life revolve round your home. Never take any major decision without putting them into consideration.
10. Talk to her, talk positively and deeply. Be open, loving and careful how you use your tongue. Never use your tongue to destroy her. Instead, let your words be seasoned with grace.
11. Good fatherhood. Don’t just be a father, be a daddy. Anybody can father a child but it takes more than ability to be a DADDY. You must be
D- Disciplined
A- Available
D- Dependable
D- Distinct
Y- Yoked with your family
12. You must be godly and homely. Don’t be a midnight husband or a run-away father; be there for your family. Perform your duties in protecting your wife and children.
WONDERS OF BIG M OF MARRIAGE.
The big M of marriage is MERCY!!!
Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and
obtaineth favour of the Lord. (Proverbs 18:22 KJV)
The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he
receives favor from the lord. (Proverbs 18:22 NLT)
Find a wife and you find a good thing; it shows
that the Lord is good to you. (Proverbs 18:22 GNB)
WHAT MERCY IS
— Mercy is the leniency or compassion shown to
the offender by the person charged with the
responsibility of administering justice, showing
favor instead of Judgement.
— It also mean to forgive and be kind
2 KIND OF PEOPLE
— People who are Enjoying mercy
— People that are destitute of mercy
And he said, Blessed be the Lord God of my
master Abraham, who hath not left destitute my
master of his mercy and his truth: I being in the
way, the Lord led me to the house of my master’s
brethren. (Genesis 24:27 KJV)
— IT WAS MERCY THAT FOUND WIFE FOR ISAAC
— MERCY IS THE BIG M THAT CAN MAKE YOU GET
THE RIGHT PARTNER AND REST IN OUR MARRIAGE
WHEN YOU DO NOT DESERVE IT.
WHAT MERCY DOES
–Preserves from death and destruction.
–Mercy Protect one from Mess in life and
Marriage
–Mercy brings Help in time of Needs
–Mercy brings Favor from God and man into
Family
HOW TO PROVOKE MERCY OF GOD FOR
MARRIAGE.
1: CONFESS AND FORSAKE YOUR SIN
He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but
whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have
mercy. (Proverbs 28:13 KJV)
2: ASK FOR IT:
Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall
find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For
every one that asketh receiveth; and he that
seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall
be opened. (Matthew 7:7, 8 KJV)
3: SOW FOR IT
Sow to yourselves in righteousness, reap in
mercy; break up your fallow ground: for it is time
to seek the Lord, till he come and rain
righteousness upon you. (Hosea 10:12 KJV)
4: POSITION YOURSELF FOR IT
—Through service unto God
— Through Good Character
Behold, as the eyes of servants look unto the hand
of their masters, and as the eyes of a maiden unto
the hand of her mistress; so our eyes wait upon
the Lord our God, until that he have mercy upon
us. (Psalms 123:2 KJV)
5: TRUST IN THE LORD
Be merciful unto me, O God, be merciful unto me:
for my soul trusteth in thee: yea, in the shadow of
thy wings will I make my refuge, until these
calamities be overpast. (Psalms 57:1 KJV)
6: LET YOUR HOPE BE IN GOD
Let thy mercy, O Lord, be upon us, according as
we hope in thee. (Psalms 33:22 KJV)
7: BE MERCIFUL TO OTHERS
Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain
mercy. (Matthew 5:7 KJV)
The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but
he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh. (Proverbs
11:17 KJV)
8: LIVE IN RIGHTEOUSNESS:
Sow to yourselves in righteousness, reap in
mercy; break up your fallow ground: for it is time
to seek the Lord, till he come and rain
righteousness upon you. (Hosea 10:12 KJV)
QUALITIES OF A GOOD HUSBAND
▪️LISTEN; He should be concerned about her thoughts and stories. A woman wants a husband she can open up to. An emotional companion.
▪️ KEEP QUIET;He should know when to hold back his tongue to prevent things from escalating especially when she is moody.
▪️ COMMUNICATE;He should learn the art of communication; face to face and over the phone. Learn to check up on her, to engage, to chat her up and keep loneliness away.
▪️ GIVE DIRECTION;He should learn to give direction. Where they are heading to as a couple and family? He should offer confidence, vision and leadership.
▪️ STAY FAITHFUL;He should show commitment to the vision of their love through faithfulness. Leading from the front publicly and privately. Keeping off other women.
▪️PURSUE;He should date his wife no matter how long they have been together. Make her feel special, compliment her, flirt with her, pursue her, romance her, excite her heart, treat her like a Queen.
▪️ BOOST SELF ESTEEM;He should make her believe in herself more, drowning her doubts, allaying her fears, reminding her who she is when she forgets, lifting up her spirits when she feels low, making her feel wonderful and beautiful when she does not feel all that.
▪️ PRAY;He should cover his wife and children in prayer, a prayer warrior in the spiritual realm, committing his family to his maker, putting on the full armour and going to war, accessing the spiritual blessings meant for his family.
▪️ COMFORT;He should be a shoulder to lean on when she cries, the person she runs to when this world overwhelms her. Her cover.
▪️ SEXUALLY AROUSE;He should make her feel desired and wanted. Know which buttons to push to give her sweet highs.
▪️PROVIDE;Whether she earns more than him or not, he should play his part in meeting the needs of the family and seek ways to get more provisions and investments.
▪️ ENCOURAGE;He should be her voice of reason. The firm voice that counters her negative voices or the storms that shake her. He should be that man who tells her “I believe in you honey. You can do this”
▪️GIVE PEACE;He should be a peace maker, knowing how to calm tense moments and avoid drama.
▪️CREATE HUMOUR;He should know how to be her clown, how to mine for laughs out of her, how to make her smile, how to make her remember him when he is far from her and find herself smiling all by herself.
▪️PROTECT;This world can be tough for a woman; his mother, his sister, his friends, her friends, her boss, strangers might attack her. He should have the ability to keep her safe and make her feel she has an ally.
*SERVE;He should put his ego aside and attend to his wife and family even without being asked, anticipating their needs, being there hero. To lead is to serve.
*DEFEND HER FROM HIMSELF;A man can become his wife’s worst enemy, the pain he can cause her if he chooses to harm her physically, emotionally, sexually or financially is too great. He should make sure he doesn’t be her worst mistake.
▪️INSPIRE;His words carry so much weight. Words of appreciation and encouragement are enough to keep her going, he should keep refueling and recharging her.
▪️HELP AND SUPPORT;He should care about her dreams and life goals and be her purpose partner, helping her be the best version of herself. He should ease her load and help out at home. They are a team.
▪️GIVE STABILITY AND SECURITY;He should make sure that he is consistent, being her constant, a steady hand. When a woman is given clarity, she lets down her guard and releases her love.
▪️TOUCH;He should understand how sensitive a woman’s skin is and how it loves to be touched. He should learn the non verbal communication of touch, how to rub her back, hold her waist, stroke her skin and cuddle up with her.
▪️ABILITY TO NEED HIS WIFE;He should also have the ability to be vulnerable, to need his wife, to allow her to do the above things to him, it is possible, is this too much for Men?
▪️DRAW HER CLOSE TO GOD;Above all, he must always and constantly lead the way in drawing her close to God.
HOW TO CALM YOUR HUSBAND'S MIND
1. MAKE LOVE TO HIM
Sex has a way of relaxing a man. You will change his mood when you make love to him, especially if you are the one who seduces him and initiates it
2. DON'T MAKE THE HOME A WARZONE
If coming home to you is coming home to yet another argument and fight where you explode and turn everything into an issue, he will dread coming home and it hurts when home is a place to run away from, not to run to
3. ASK HIM HOW HE IS
Most women want the husband to ask them "How was your day?", "How did you sleep?" "How are you?" yet they rarely ask the husband these. If these questions make you feel cared for, your husband also wants to feel cared for
4. ORGANIZE HIS LIFE
A lot of men can be disorganized, especially when they are going through a lot in life or have a lot on their mind. This chaos in their system, dressing, schedule or environment can lead to more unease on their mind. When you help him clear the clutter and attend to some of his needs without him asking, he will think better
5. DON'T ATTACK HIS MAN CAVE
Most have a man cave. This is an activity they do or a place they go to perhaps a room; maybe to play a game, watch TV, meditate and think, write, read, create, work out or just be. Don't attack this, just agree with him on how he can balance his time so that he doesn't spend too many hours in his man cave
6. PRAY FOR HIM
You are the one who knows best his potential, struggles, battles and questions; commit him to prayer. Let him hear you pray for him
7. HELP HIM OUT FINANCIALLY
A lot of men are going through stress due to finances. Help him, by not putting pressure on him to give the family a lifestyle he can't afford at present, by helping to pay some of the bills, by helping him manage finances better, by saving and seeking long term investments, by stepping up especially when he has been fired or going through business losses
8. AFFIRM HIM
A man can get tired, a man can go through burn out, a man can question himself, a man can worry, a man can get discouraged; which is why it is important for you to remind him of his greatness, celebrate his achievements and tell him how proud you are of him. This motivates him
9. STAY FAITHFUL TO HIM
Nothing destabilizes a man like when he suspects or finds out that the wife he loves and has given his all to is entertaining, flirting, sleeping with or longing to be with another man. Spare him this torture.
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