Relationships can be tricky and they almost all come with some challenges. If you’re lucky, you’ll notice the red flags before they become too serious. There are the obvious ones, such as emotional, verbal or physical abuse, that are automatic grounds for ending things. And a lot of drama (yelling, crying, continuous bickering, roller coaster emotions) rarely indicates a happy union.
Stop being so needy.
Especially in the early stages of dating, you should ask yourself: Who needs what? If you have a weakness, or have a fear that you don’t have any better options, don’t approach things from the get-go that way. There are plenty of good men out there, and there’s no sense creating a relationship around your own insecurities. If you’re not ready to commit to something serious, you probably should not take the next step. If your idea of a relationship is hanging out with your friends at night, moving in together a few months later and getting married after a year, then your relationship may not be a serious one. If you can’t even commit to that — then don’t make it a serious commitment.
Learn to be vulnerable.
As you become emotionally invested in the relationship, it’s common to forget to always be mentally involved. Mindfulness is a key element in keeping things balanced. If you’re not sure where your relationship is heading, get some objective feedback and talk to your partner. It’s better to know the warning signs before it’s too late. When in doubt, be cautious. Too often, we don’t see our partner’s best side and become jealous, insecure and overbearing. Remember: If you’re interested in someone, you should love them for who they are, not who you want them to be. You should care about them, support them and enjoy the good times with them. Relationships are not easy, but with proper communication, patience and the right dose of openness, it’s possible to stay together for a lifetime.
Have a constructive conversation.
Those are red flags you want to be aware of, and we’re all guilty of it at some point. Of course, there’s a huge difference between feeling like you can’t stand to be around your partner and feeling like they want to harm you, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have emotional or mental issues. If the signs are obvious enough, you’re probably justified in cutting your losses and going your separate ways. Unfortunately, that’s not what most people do. If they recognize the signs in their partner and are able to have a constructive conversation, they can make the relationship work. However, that doesn’t always happen in a healthy relationship, so you need to have a conversation to be sure they’re on the same page.
Make time for each other.
Just like relationships come with challenges, so do jobs. You’ll often find that couples who complain about work actually love what they do. This means there’s likely to be a strong communication system in place. Have that talk about how you feel about your relationship in a positive light. “It’s important to have at least one conversation every single week to keep each other in the loop,” life and career coach Rori Sassoon tells Forbes. “What you focus on and what you’re grateful for at work, matters to each other.” Keep your cool. At the end of the day, the other person should never lose their temper. When you do it, you not only lose that person’s respect, but you also deal with resentment.
Don’t use money as a reason for not spending time together.
But there are a number of red flags that are often avoidable. Here are the six biggest relationship mistakes that you need to avoid. 1. Taking Relationship Relationships Too Seriously You may think that what you have is special, but one day it could be all over for you. Nobody is immortal and nobody wants to go through heartache again. Life is too short to worry about a relationship. As an emotional person, you’re an introvert. You have a tendancy to overthink and put a lot of pressure on everything. Approaching a relationship seriously as opposed to putting up a friendly facade is a mistake. Don’t get too attached. Don’t expect that things can remain this way forever. Of course, the best scenario is for both parties to be willing to make a change.
Be honest and don’t cheat
The biggest issue in my marriage was me cheating on my wife. I had multiple affairs and lied about them to my wife, to our friends and family. My wife also cheated on me, before we got married. I still feel sick about this. The confession cost me my family and all relationships I had with them. As a result of my dishonesty, I was driven to more and more extreme acts of rage and control. Even though my wife was also unfaithful, I did it more. She actually was planning on leaving me, for the other man, before I told her about the affairs. The affair was also a catalyst for us getting a divorce. Cheating destroys trust and the foundation of your relationship.